| | Well, I did it.
About three weeks ago (or so), I started to go out every night and feed. It is something that I've needed to do for a long time. I would go out to bars and such after work and wouldn't get home until maybe 4:00 in the morning or later.
This behaviour seriously worried my "girlfriend", as she assumed that I was probably cheating on her or some such thing. So, I "came out" to her. I though that I didn't really have anything to loose. Could her reaction really be worse than thinking that I was cheating?
So, I sat down with her one evening and tried to explain everything the best that I could. I also gave her a folder full of papers from years ago when I was researching real-vampirizm for myself.
Things went well, at first. She tried really hard to understand. She asked lots of questions. She tried to accept me as I am.
About a week later, she came to the decision that she could accept my condition. She couldn't, however, accept my actions. She couldn't accept being alone every night, wondering where I was and if I was safe or not. She couldn't accept feeling jealous all the time at all of the attention that I get from women (and the fact that I liked it... and even FED upon it). And, she couldn't accept the fact that I CAN'T stop what I'm doing or it will seriously affect my health in a bad way.
I have to do what I do. I can't stop. I WON'T stop!
So, we mutually decided to separate.
3 days later, I picked up the next "girlfriend".
Should I tell her about what I am? Only when I want to get rid of her.
*** Notice that I use "quotation marks" with the word "girlfriend". This is because my idea of this relationship (at this time) differs from the traditional ideas. Right now, my idea of "girlfriend" denotes a relationship that is more significant than all of the others. This does not, however, denote a feeling of monogamy. Right now, the lines in my relationships are pretty fuzzy. Although, I am always honest to everyone in my ideas and intentions. And I don't cheat! |
| | Posted 4/21/2005 1:45 AM - 30 Views - 4 eProps - 2 comments
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